Monday, June 7, 2010

Looking through the wounds and surrendering

"Looking thru the glass darkly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I am known." 1 Cor 13:12
To be carnally minded is death, but to be spiritually minded is life and peace." Romans 8:6
When life chews you up and spits you out, when wounds of sorrow are to your very core, its next impossible to "see" clearly with your "naked eyes".

Looking around me, looking at my life, (which having to much time on your hands can FORCE you to do)........ I see a train wreck. Oh there were survivors , no physical "deaths" but I feel like I died just the same. Left with the pieces of my shattered life, that once was full, with the possibilities endless, I am FORCED to my knees, to plead with the Father, lover of my soul, to show me what is the reason for my life now. The people around me , wounded too, have to search their depths for answers , I can't help them. Shattered dreams lie at my husbands feet, I can't help him, all I can do is pray.

I was reading David Wilkerson devotional and he said "I can scarcely take it in when I read these words, "And the glory which thou gavest me I have given them; that they may be one, even as we are one" (John 17:22). THIS IS GODS GLORY?? I'm seeing thru the glass poorly for sure.
This is where the "carnal mind" and the "spirit mind" collide . I must decide in what realm I am going to exist..... to wallow or to believe. Just believe, that against all evidence in the natural, everything that screams "your life is over" , just believe God's got a plan, a glorious plan!! and it is going to unfold IF I WALK IN FAITH
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With every different season , I am reminded of what I used to do.... I don't go looking for , it just smack s me in the face one day out of the blue, the facts are irrefutable if your looking in the natural realm, I WANT, I NEED TO GET OUT THAT REALM!!!
Surrender, surrender, surrender,........ surrender everything, the horse, the guitar, the singing, the running, playing soccer, kickboxing, walking normal, hiking with my husband, playing catch with Myles, WALKING IN BARE FEET, etc....... surrender. Look through Jesus eyes, look at whats really important, surrender the "things" and just believe. To be SPIRITUALLY MINDED IS LIFE AND PEACE.

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